I have always been afraid to truly love myself.
To deeply love another no doubt.
Cherish a love together?
What is it?
I allowed myself to disrespect love.
To walk all over love and to tear it down.
Why is that?
I have been living my life as a "victim" thinking of myself only.
Thinking about the love I missed.
Where was it?
I held on to this fear of never being able to embrace love.
I didn't think I could handle love.
Where is serenity?
What happened to WE.
I kept reverting back to living for ME.
I tried to keep a step ahead and dish out pain before it found thee.
Nothing was intentional but to the beholder it would appear to be.
My spirit is broken because I have torn love to pieces.
I kept assuming that there was nothing good love had in store for me.
Not trusting love backfired and I have become alienated.
My spirit is truly broken and I no longer desire to be.
Why would love, you see?
No more looking in the mirror and saying "why me?"
Judgement comes from God and in this case will be because of me.
God fix me.