Poem Commentary

This is a much different style for me.  It is song lyrics adapted to verse for the site.  So plesae excuse the literal writing that is not like me, but there is a spoken part in the song, ironically enough, that is a poem and is more the metaphorical ramblings that my friends have commented they enjoy so much.  And they would be the italicized lines at the end.




Stand by for the tender wave
we are hitting the sky tonight
Raise them high and listen for for the words
tip them back, we're fling high
Dropping five, chase with five or more
until the light says goodbye
Stack the glass on a mile high
heap of the night's delights

     And I cant see, What's in front of me
     Although it looks like me
     And I can't tell, who this reflection is
     In the mirror, although it's me, heading for
     A Landslide

Booze and broads has always been the way
for this guy to run and hide
Vodka, scotch, whiskey till I die
filling a hole down inside
There a'int enough beer and liquor to
last this lifetime of mine
so keep them coming until I can't see
all of these things bothering me

Life goes fast, in the blink of an eye
But each second, an eternity gone by
Pain is seen, in the bottom of the glass
Never remember, the eve of last past
Lights go out, eyes closed to all inside
heading for, the bottom of the landslide

Poem Comments


Please login or register

You must be logged in or register a new account in order to
leave comments/feedback and rate this poem.

Login or Register

wamomo commented on Landslide


You are sooo talented. Your ability to translate realistic experience into verse is fantastic! I agree with danmartyjake1 on this one...would love to hear the music to this : )

sammia commented on Landslide


Wonderful write. Loved the flow. And I cant see, What's in front of me Although it looks like me And I can't tell, who this reflection is In the mirror, although it's me, heading for A Landslide This part really got me. You are a wonderful writer keep writting and sharing. You get a 10 from me



thanks for your comments! the part you like is actually the chorus of the song.

WindsOfMemory commented on Landslide


wow dude. i hope when u make a melody version that u send it to me. i like the lyrics. i might even need ur permission to have my band come up with something for it. :D keep up the good work



thanks, dude. unfortunately, there is already a song for it and being played live for the first time at my next gig...but thanks!

jademelissa74 commented on Landslide


This is such a powerful piece. You crafted a well written poem, filled with emotions that reach the readers head on. Amazing write!

danmartyjake1 commented on Landslide


A poem of descriptive descent into the bottom of the bottle. Would love to hear it cast to a melody. Good Write!

When power leads man towards arrogance, poetry reminds him of his limitations. When power narrows the area of man's concern, poetry reminds him of the richness and diversity of existence. When power corrupts, poetry cleanses.

John F. Kennedy (1917-1963) Thirty-fifth President of the USA

dangedmanjr’s Poems (25)

Title Comments
Title Comments
Unrequited 1
Some Haiku for You! 2
Landslide 8
almost reality 3
Closed Eyes, Open Heart (UPA Pic challenge) 16
Arithmea 12
from the ground up 38
His, Hers, Their's 7
Mr. Mom 29
climax of a kiss 13
A prayer... 11
the time is now 11
the time has come 7
the thin line between 3
no more 2
rage 7
I can't... 4
blurred clarity 6
incoherent ramblings of a madman 2
in the wind 3
psycho dicotomy 10
the lone rider 4
Ten minutes...ete
Dream scape 8