I recently picked up a magazine and upon looking inside

I spied an article entitled “Getting in touch with one’s feminine side”

Being a life-long believer in all types of exploration

I read on and was soon filled with tons of illumination

It seems that when it comes to sensitivity and caring

I was missing a lot when it comes to loving and sharing

So I made a commitment to give it a good try

And promised for one day to bid my male ego goodbye

The first hour was hard and my resolve was almost not enough

As an itch came upon me and I fought against scratching my stuff

I visited the bathroom and instead of striking the male pose

I lowered the lid, sat down and… the rest I cannot disclose

Suffice it to say that I found the water quite cold

And I imagine I was what you might call “a sight to behold”

Needing a big mug of coffee to stabilize my nerves

I opted instead for a cup of tea and some strawberry preserves

Instead of guzzling it down and letting out a loud burp

I daintily brought the cup to my lips and took a small slurp

I turned on the TV with thoughts of watching some football

But instead tuned to Oprah and settled in to watch it all

I fell asleep within minutes after Oprah gave away 100 cars

And awoke to some guy from India peddling solid wood sitars

It was now time for dinner, steak, fries and beer sounded just fine

But instead I opted for a 100 calorie salad and a small glass of wine

Now my day is over and my exploration is coming to a close

        And I have mixed feelings about bidding my feminine side adios

Being a male provides some freedoms that are great I suppose

Like not wearing bras and those dreaded panty hose

But there is a lot to be said about the woman’s gentle touch

Her softness mixed with unrelenting determination and such

So all you tough guys out there set aside the macho window dressings

Tell her you love her tonight and count your many many blessings.

©Copyright Charlie Gragg, October 15, 2010