I walked along the shore and noticed every living thing
Particles from centuries past the windswept waters edge
Bursts of sunlight pierced my broken comprehension
Awareness struck me
Rusty gages, worn frayed edges of things softened my heart
A shift began
A Melody filled me
Purpose became my heart


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Chaos128 commented on Transcendance


You have a true gift for idiom, and your tangential connections actually create lines to read between. It's a confident author that doesn't feel the need to hold the reader's hand. Artie's 100% right, this is a real 10.



Many thanks for that compliment. I appreciate you reading "Transcendance" and for seeing beyond the words to the truest meaning. ;-)

Artie commented on Transcendance


I love this. I spent most of my childhood on the beach, and miss it everyday. 10 from me.



Thanks Artie, I am reading yours right now.

trocka7 commented on Transcendance


Once again, absolutely beautiful! The lines, "Bursts of sunlight pierced my broken comprehension/ Awareness struck me" are incredible and speak volumes about the nature of awareness and I was struck by your ability to put it so easily into words. Your poems have the unique ability of moving me in a very personal way, thank you for sharing...



I am pleased that my poem could do that. Thanks for sharing with me.

ginga commented on Transcendance


jake, If you want imagery comments, this poem certainly passes the test with a 10.The vivid description is wonderful. The one stanza short, but succinct style is perfect! ginga



Thanks for your valuable feedback

laydbak1 commented on Transcendance


Hi... I was just doing a few random reads and saw yours on the opening page and came here to check it out... I enjoyed the imagery here in this piece, but I got stumped on the your interpretation of one word gages near the end and took it literally as symbolic of a challenge of some sort in the context... A good write...



Thanks for your rating and comments.. please rate my other poems



Thanks for your rating and comments.. please rate my other poems

If I feel physically as if the top of my head were taken off, I know that is poetry.

Emily Dickinson (1830-1886) American poet.

danmartyjake1’s Poems (99)

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Remembrance 10
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Pirate Love 10
Eternal Memory Kept 13
The Only Way to Win 22
Waiting 12
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Soul Riding 12
Pray to Stay 7
Naked Love 12
Kismet 19
Down to Pieces and Parts 10
Bold Love 10
Spirit Body 17
Earth Love 19
Away to the Garden 11
True Friends 13
Feathers & Light 10
Thoughts on the Holiday 11
Grief Abounds 10
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Something Preserved 4
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Passions' Dark Embrace 9
Swim Team 5
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Perseverance 9
America Rise Up 5
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No School Today 4
Cheers for a Song 1
At Mother's Tender Breast 4
Innocence Departed 10
Water Dance 11
Honesty 11
Innocent 3
Nor'Easter 6
Wind 7
Stoned Love 7
Dance the Dance 11
Tribute 2
Wonder 7
All Proper Hollow Staples 5
Stormy 10
A Lover Knows 6
Prayer's Light 8
Child Dream 13
Forgiveness Prayer 8
My Prince 10
Twilight 8
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A Heart's Song 3
Barter 3
Hearth 5
Transcendance 6
Clearing 5
Fields of Jasmine 17
A Little Part of Us 9