• MalikPeterson

Poem Commentary

This is another one of my old pieces. It's about 4-5 years old. Enjoy if you will!




Many in our society are written off as criminals and headed for nothing but prison or an early death from birth. So I offer you the inner workings of the mind of the forsaken…



The Voice of Rage


I’ve got a battle axe in my hand and not afraid to use it.

Don’t mean to take away from gangster music but...

Satan made me do it.

My anger, hatred, and rage today is just fluid.

Don’t think I’m crazy, or mind hazy, my vision’s lucid.

My disdain for the humane and under aged is ruthless.

Society keeps wiring me the change I need to prove it.

The mainframe’s computed me no way or future tense.

I’m bored with being abhorred off written, forward hence.

Animalistic is the cannibalistic instinct I’m viewed with.

A babbling misfit going ballistic till I realistically lose it.

The gross exaggeration I’m capable of reformation is useless,

So I wield my axe from across my back attacking...

Who’s next?


The Voice of Reason


My dead end birth has hurt me more than it’s hurt the earth,

To be viewed in the eyes and despised as some sort of curse,

Thanking the lord for my prized guise and I ignore the church,

Preachers preaching from Bentleys can’t sell me any...

enormous worth.

My mind bends and breaks till it hurts so I can make it work.

Just as the caged bird sings, I too can make my encasing chirp

Instead of rage at a young age I learned to decorate my lurch,

With thoughts of success, showing at best, I could enable perk.

It’s more than easy to fall into the fable of a strangled jerk,

Chocked off from life so I kill and maim cause I aim to hurt.

Instead I rise suited with prudish tie and brand famous shirt.

I support my cause to bring out my naysayers’ ire and irk,

And do my best to bring worth through my girth which,

will deny me dearth

The boss of myself I admire my work and resist my urge,

to fire the earth.


The Voice of Reflection


I sit in my cell now, earth’s hell without fire breathing.

I shed a tear as no one cares or sees my inner bleeding.

I consented to my label and did my soul a treason.

A light went off in my head but I ignored the beacon.

Seeking, searching I find now I had a choice preceding,

Society and my environment kept me from inner reading.

Pleading pleas while my mind was more than fleeting.

Needing breathing apparatus as the sentence beats me,

Beating, eating away at my tattered self completely.

Feeling, conceding to death encased in a place,

beneath me.

Conceiving, conceiting is nothing I’m able to speak on.

Mangling, dangling my self from a shoelace I choked on.

Retching, breathing depleting my makers meeting,

scheduled this season.

Hanging, aiming to silence rage and...

listen to reason

© 2006-2010 Malik Peterson. All Rights Reserved.

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sandyb commented on "Voices"


Wow, I was impressed. Nice set up. Gets you to really think.



Thank you so much...and I am glad you liked it. I thank you for stopping by and appreciate it as always :)

Lizziewriter27 commented on "Voices"


That was an amazing string of poems! I love how you manage to be descriptive and use intriguing language without it being overdone. I especially like 'The Voice of Rage'!



Thanks lizzie...I am glad you liked it..and that you had a favorite. I appreciate the action of stopping by which you partook in :)

MindNumbing commented on "Voices"


This has such depth and creativity, Malik! I love the defined steps that were taken with this one, with the Rage, Reason & Reflection... Here are some Kudos for YOU!



Thank you kindly miss lady...more kudos for my pockets. I appreciate them greatly :)

soulwriter commented on "Voices"


Let's back this up - reflection, reason, rage,,,, all interchangeable, and you artfully explained them all with self conviction...making the reader share the in the confines of your prison, while escaping with through the release of your emotions. "I shed a tear as no one cares or sees my inner bleeding." The greatest of authors are able to make their readers feel what they have sculpted through words, you have my attention! 10 from beginning to the end



Thank you soulwriter...I am glad I was able to capture your attention with this one. I hope you will keep stopping by good sir. Cheers!!!

KtIrish commented on "Voices"


It's dark, but full of truth and pain, and sorrow, and shame. Another incredible work of art from you, my friend. What do I have here? You guessed it, Kudos!



Why thank you Miss Caity...I am glad you liked it as always and...now we have a situation...I busy myself making and giving out kudos to others...preparing rooms...building machines...building houses...and never set one aside for myself...oh dear...what to do...what to do? lol...I will take your kudos and think of something...for now...I will just carry them around in my pocket. :)

In science one tries to tell people, in such a way as to be understood by everyone, something that no one ever knew before. But in poetry, it's the exact opposite.

Franz Kafka (1883-1924) Czech writer.

MalikPeterson’s Poems (52)

Title Comments
Title Comments
"We: The World Famous Shameless Disappearance
"The Gaudy Guise Of External Fortitude" 20
"Memorandum To The Masked Masses" 14
"The Melancholy Of The Heartless Ones" 19
"The Misconceived Symphony Of Synergy" 38
"The Complex Theory Of Beauty" 29
"Stuck In Traffic" 29
"Kiss The Demons And Make Them Cry" 37
"The Making Of A Classic" 16
"Only The Righteous Know" 46
"It Was All A Dream"(dream series) 13
"For The Love Of...?"(5 poem series) 23
"Media Collateral Ligaments" 40
"Note To Self" 19
"Survivor Series" 9
"Play It By Ear" 12
"On Pleasure I Land" 25
"Siamese Nightja-wu" 3
"Love Story v1: Jade and I" 22
"Would You Still Love Me?" 32
"Yesterday's Future Present" 18
"She's Deeply In Love" 26
"Voices" 10
"The Somnambulists
"The Passer By" 11
"A Heartfelt Debate" 8
"A Stark Life" 11
"The Sex Issue" 6
"Torn" 31
"Speaking of Deja Vu..." 4
"The Paradise Club" 5
"7 Days of Bloodshed" 13
"Reality" 6
"First Class Flyer" 4
"I Never Wrote A Love Poem..." 14
"Seasons' Dance" 5
"An UpWrite Soul" 4
"Lucid Alpha" 15
"The Voyager's Art" 5
"Promiscuous" 9
"Land of Make Believe" 5
"Normality" 9
"Once Upon a Yesterday" 11
"Victim" 18
"Just Invisible" 7
"Esteemed Colleague" 9
"Fly-By-Night Lights" 6
"Just Your Average Dreamer"(entr
y#3 dream series)
"The Essence of a Dream" 7
"Dreams" 13
"War" 9
"I Want to be a Martian" 19