When life hands you a lemon
Dang it....add water and sugar and lets have a party

When women do you wrong
Dang it....throw out another line, there's plenty of fishies in the sea

When the boss get on your last nerve
Dang it....wave the middle finger in your mind till you find another job or take longer breaks

When the creditors keep callin'
Dang it....muzzle the phone and tell them you moved

When the gas station hikes up the prices
Dang it....light a match

When the cops pulls you over for speedin'
Dang it....have a good lie ready, like; tell him you have the H1N1 virus then cough in your hands as you proceed to hand him/her your driver's license

When your girlfriend, wife or significant other begins to nag
Dang it....tell them you have a head cold and your ears are clogged

When you see your pastor comin' out of the liquor store
Dang it....don't complain, he's only givin' the wines spirits (wink)

When your child start actin' a fool
Dang it....don't spank him, he's only takin' after you

When your child still act a fool
Dang it....get some parentin' skills

When your teacher ask you a question
Dang it....have the right answer because the wrong answer keeps them callin' on you

When your mom or dad grounds you
Dang it....tell them you want to become a stripper (this works for boys too) "wink"

When your boyfriend want to try a new position
Dang it....let him...err ask him where he learned that

When your girlfriend, wife or significant other has a headache
Dang it....tell her you're going to visit your favorite cousin; you know the one that is only related to you by your word "wink"
Dang it....I shouldn't have mentioned that one

When your dog humps your leg
Dang it....hump his....errr neuter him or buy him a four-legged hoe

When the ugly women at the bar starts to look good
Dang it....don't skip another AA meeting or get her drunk so she don't remember your name. It works for me "wink"