LAMENTATIONS
They always left me
They left me alone.
They said I was too fat,
too dark, too short
too black.
They said my hair was
too ethnic and my lips
too full.
“What is wrong with me?”
I’d ask the reflection in the mirror.
The very sound of my voice
sent them into fits of anger.
I was too needy
for their attention,
too affectionate
for their caring.
I was not even sexy
enough, not to mention.
I wanted a commitment,
They wanted a fling.
I was told not to
get too close
and that I’d never
be number one.
I was told
my feet were too fat
and my clothes
not tight enough.
I was told I
was too smart
and that I read too much
and smiled too much
and didn’t smile enough
and sang too much
and laughed too much
and didn’t laugh enough
and cried too much
and prayed too much.
and didn‘t pray enough.
I would never
be good enough.
There was always
someone better.
“Why, God, did you make me this way?”

Candace Nadine Breen 02/03/2009