a happy birthday

6 Comments

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  • Love

    Poem Commentary

    i wrote this for my girlfriend and best friend valentina banuelos for her birthday on 04/21/2010... gods gift to me ...

    a happy birthday

    joys and laughter
    our smiles and tears.
    dreams we go after
    i hold so dear .

    i cant imagen
    being without you .
    time and time again
    your there for me too.

    the love you give
    as you hold me tight.
    i want you to live
    with me day and night .

    your my dream
    and my happiness inside .
    your my everything
    always there by my side .

    thank you mi amor
    for your love everyday .
    to you who i adore
    a happy birthday !

     

    Poem Comments

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    princesita commented on a happy birthday

    05-18-2010

    I forgot,,,,, you must post all the poems you have writen me and our kids!!! they are so emotives!!! looks like you wrote dem when for you we were all your world!!!
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    princesita commented on a happy birthday

    05-18-2010

    yeah my love,,,I didnt want to tell you about some writing techniques,,,remeber I am student??? so I have to stay reading and reading my school textbooks,,but let me Tell you that I really proud of you and I know our lil princesss will be proud of you too!!!
    Reply to Comment

    Musicmynded1 commented on a happy birthday

    04-27-2010

    Just what was already stated below, good sounding flow tho' keep it up.
    Reply to Comment

    dumdumdj commented on a happy birthday

    04-27-2010

    nice write...i agree with dumplin....fix up those errors and it'll will be much better.....continue writing.....you have talent...and your friends bday was 2 days before mine
    Reply to Comment

    dumplin commented on a happy birthday

    04-27-2010

    You have skill, but you really need to learn the difference in "you're" and "your". There were several spelling errors in this piece, but good talent takes honing. Keep up the good work and you'll get better and better. A very nice birthday wish, for sure!
    Reply to Comment

    Poetry is not the expression of personality but an escape from personality.

    T. S. Eliot (1888-1965) American-English poet and playwright.

    paiuteenjun’s Poems (2)

    Title Comments Submitted
    Title Comments Submitted
    i'm finally comming home 4 04/27/2010
    a happy birthday 6 04/26/2010
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