MY SISTER

MY SISTER
I really want to thank you
For being by my side
And always staying close to me
When its not been a perfect ride

You've survived the impossible and experienced a Tragic Loss!
And you've done the unknown
You'll always have a part of me
Even though miles apart, your deep in my heart

Before the time i can remember
You've always taken care of me
And the rest of us kids! You have given so much
But i was little then
I didn't really see

I thought life was great when I was really little
Until I got a little older
When we had our mom and dad
But little did i know
I would think of you as our mom & guardian angel
All the abuse and anger and tears that we all had shed and what we had to live through, Only made us that much stronger! Janice, I couldn't have made it there without you! As years have gone by I have thought how much you meant to me and I just never said it! I know now our parents really did love us they just didn't know to show it. They did the best they knew how to raise us kids. They also came from families who didn't know how to show there love and affection.  I don't have one single memory (of that little girl inside of me) that wanted to be held and be told how special I was, and for my parents to tell me they love me! I don't remember words of praise and not once of sitting upon my mommys or my daddys lap and hearing them read me stories nor any memories of being tucked into bed! Each night as I went to bed I knelt down upon my knees and cried to Heavenly Father to keep us safe and to please let them not fight tonight and please father in heaven keep me warm and safe cuz I feel the need to run away and please one day let me understand as to why we had to live and endure that house of terror! With both parents gone now from this earth to the journey that goes on beyond.  As many years have come and gone my heart was filled with a very pleasant feeling that bathed my soul in such warmth. I know it was my mom & daddy telling me they truly did love me they just didnt know how to share it. My daddy whispered to my soul! "Honey rememer that little playhouse you wanted me to build? Guess what? I built that little playhouse up in heaven for you because, if he had built it here on earth it would one day eventually crumble along with our shattered dreams. But my daddy said, my playhouse will never tumble nor will it ever get old.  He said both him and mommy have stocked my bookshelves with many bedtime stories I have longed to hear! So Janice thank you so so very much for all that you have done for our family I know i never tell you like I should, just how very special and what you mean to me! But I know without a single doubt that I love you a whole bunch!
Love Deb