Now That I'm Gone

1 Comments

  • nanoboy909
  • DAMN! It's been a long time, where all them poets at? I'll be posting some new poems soon. Hope you all check it out. :-)

Now That I'm Gone

Now That I'm Gone

By. Dran Acosta

So much pain I feel with everything I tried to conceal.

Why couldn’t I reveal? I just let it go like everything wasn’t real.

I’m sorry I had to go as I saw the black crow.

I tried to tell you how I felt, but you would rather have me melt.

Oh how I felt guilt, so much with what I dealt.

More pain has been built.

Never have I thought I would have to go so soon.

Every night as I look at the stars and the moon.

Wishing I could go one more day.

But now I have to go away.

The angels are taking me away.

I wanted to stay, but I had to follow their way.

I knew all along why you have ignored me.

I understand that you deserve more other than me.

I can never tell you why, now that I’m ready to fly.

You never thought that I cry, every time I try as I look to the sky.

Now that I’m gone everything has been drawn.

I’m sorry I couldn’t stay another day.

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SuSpence commented on Now That I'm Gone

05-22-2010

This is very good Dran, I really like the rhyme scheme you went with, multiple rhymes in the same line is sometimes difficult to do and sound good, often times it falls flat and sounds cliche, but you really made it well so smoothly. You also expressed your emotion very well here. You could really sense the sadness and the helpless feeling in your words. Great Stuff! ~Spence

nanoboy909

05/22/2010

this one is for all the ppl that had no chance of getting their feelings out..... this poem emotionally expressed the feeling for them.....

If I feel physically as if the top of my head were taken off, I know that is poetry.

Emily Dickinson (1830-1886) American poet.

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