I could...

throw a temper tantrum...
Like a toddler in his "terrible twos"
Protesting his mother vigilantly and loud
Kicking, screaming, crying "MURDER!"
Generally causing a huge spectacle in a crowd
Inviting every abled pair of eyes to gawk at my display
I would be so upset with the punishment I faced
the entire planet would be hushed by my juvenile shouts

...but what's the use?


I could...

keep it bottled inside behind iron bars...
Keep this secret solely between me and myself
Shy my insecurity away from society
Never giving the world their chance
to ridicule, persecute, judge and/or taunt
my body as it slowly disintegrates layer by layer.
Speak not of this vulnerable fact and
live out what's left of my hermit life

...but what's the use?


I could...

be vengeful of the destiny that I, in actuality, put into place...
By myself, for myself, to myself, -despite myself.
And thus projecting my anger and rage
unto countless unsuspecting victims I meet.
Reveling in the evil delight that I am vindicated and justified
by infecting someone else with the doom "I didn't ask for either."
Symbolically taking back some misperceived form of control.

...but what's the use?


I could...

use any one of these actions...
or I could choose a number of others on a list
Expressing how I feel deep within the very fibers encasing my soul.
Resonating, rattling my inner core. my entire being
Simultaneously exploding all of them outward, upward
in a chaotic confusion that makes ears bleed.

...but what's the use in any of that?



So I'll just continue like I have always done
with the knowledge and understanding
that there is something new that doesn't conform
to the previously monotonous clockwork patterns.