Viral Vulnerability
It's been two years since my diagnosis was given
and I have never had more regret for my mistake
than I do at this very moment in time.
We are all human beings, don't they understand that?
So we are bound to have a few misjudgements.
However, in this case my error is a passively fatal one.
My compromised immune system has yet again
compromised the animalistic hedonism inside me.
For some reason, tonight's surprising rejection-
out of the many I've already experienced from others,
blatently and subtle alike, has manifested an odd emotion.
I have not felt ashamed of my status until now.
After gathering up my belongings as well as
the pieces of my wounded pride and libido,
I headed outside to the chilling night for a quick smoke
taking this time to be alone with my re run of tonight.
I finally collect myself by brushing away just one
shed representation of my impending death sentence.
Once home, I hop in the shower and tried, without progress,
to scald and melt away my disease, silly me.
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