He Couldn't Believe What He Heard

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  • Love
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  • Emotional
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  • Life
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  • Happiness
    • ,
  • Family

    He Couldn't Believe What He Heard

     He couldnt believe what he heard
    When I spoke those seven numbers
    He didnt think that I liked him
    Like he like me

    From that day on
    We talked every night
    Then one day he told me he loved me

    He couldnt believe what he heard
    When I spoke those three words
    He didnt think that I loved him
    Like he loved me

    From that day on
    We spent everyday and night together
    Then one day he popped the question

    He couldnt believe what he heard
    When I told him yes
    He didnt think I wanted it to be forever
    Like he did

    From that day on
    We were inseparable
    Then one day I had some news

    He couldnt believe what he heard
    When I told him he was going to be a dad
    He didnt think I wanted a family
    Like he did

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    ccslim commented on He Couldn't Believe What He Heard

    04-21-2011

    This has pop! A nice flow and meaning! I do think that a few less words in key spots could say the same if not more than it already does and I feel like where you had separation of stanza's they could be grouped to maintain the high flow in meter. Great write!
    Reply to Comment

    MommyOf2Girls6

    04/25/2011

    Thank you! I agree with you. I remember having a little trouble writing it. It was written as a poetry challenge as well. Those can be tougher when they are telling you what to write about. :)

    Poetry is finer and more philosophical than history; for poetry expresses the universal, and history only the particular.

    Aristotle (384 BC-322 BC) Greek philosopher.

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