The other day,
Talkin' to my buddy, Steve,
Man said something about me
I was like, "Dude, please...
I write all my stuff
I'm about as illegit
As I am buff.
Now, I don't mean to brag,
But I've got a little muscle:
Just enough to hustle,
I mean,
I could take you in a fight
Unless my head's
Smaller than your thigh.
But mostly
I'm totally
The greatest writer
You ever did see.
Except Dickens.
Oh, and that dude, Shakespeare.
And possibly my cat
Who just drank some beer...
Just kidding.
But really,
Sometimes I get a little
Silly,
And every once in a while
I feel a little
Chilly.
See?
Right there!
Who eles would do that?
Except maybe my cat...
You know,
The one I mentioned
Earlier?
That cat's got some swagger,
And he's a bit less girlier
Than Shakespeare
After a beer...
I think...
But I don't know
'Cause I don't drink...
And I can't go wrong,
You know it?
Oh, and by the way,
This makes me
A poet.
Therefore I know
That this is
The end of the po-
em."
And Steve was like,
"Bro,
What does that have to do with
Your mom, yo?"