Strips
To strips, fries and ketchup
There's more than a dinner.
There's smiling and mixup
And blushing and titter.
So I don't deny it,
You are very precious,
But what is the deal with
Those frightening eyelashes?
Strips
7 Comments
Tags: Admiration , Humor
Poem Commentary
I think this one calls for a bit of explpanation. There was this girl working in a local fast food restaurant and she had these enormous false eyelashes. I asked her out, but she turned me down although there were some unmistakeable signs that she fancied me too.
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Poem Comments
(7)
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01-10-2010
- Or, how about a metal rod piercing from the lip up through the nostril? niiice! A great observation, we don't always say what we think, and sometimes, justified. very clever-funny!
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04/26/2010
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AKRAMSAQIB commented on Strips
10-26-2009
- comparison of epitites spiritual and physical .well written
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lustfulsoul commented on Strips
10-24-2009
- Well, with fewer words I say that this piece is quite intriguing and thought-provoking. The words describe more than just a fast-food meal. Sarcasm always will reel in the reader. Great job!
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10/24/2009
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cousinsoren commented on Strips
10-18-2009
- I totally disagree with His Majesty,--no offence meant. This poen is saying a lot in few terse, yet sarcastic lines. There is more to a meal than what foods are on the plate. The savoury preparation ought to entail the skill and moreso the personality of the cook. Similarly, the attractive and appetizing serving of a meal requires a waitress with beauty and charm. In this poem, the poet reacts to an oddity, and warns that false makeup, "frightening make-up" can turn off or repulse a ccustomer. The message is very clear. It is a poem of feeling It sarcastically , mischievously, and amusingly succeeds in producing a sort of video still. . It captures and crystalizes a moment in time The contrasting imagery is effective, The waitress is precious ,and at the same time, her make-up is absurd. Weshoul not overlook the precise stylistics of this poem. The rhyming scheme is perfect. The metrical three - feet ( trimeters) is regular and suited to suggest a brief moment , and a swift concise remark. The banality of the theme is intended to draw a chuckle from the reader or listener. Excellent craftsmanship in zsimplicity is well displayed in this poem Rating for effective treatment of a banal or trite incident is 1o,
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10/19/2009
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08/24/2012
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cousinsoren commented on Strips
10-18-2009
- I totally disagree with the King. This poem is saying a lot. Of course, there is more to a didnner than what foods are on the plate/ The savoury prepraatiion ought to entail the personality of the cook. The attractive serving of a meal requiree a waitress with beauty and charm. In this poem the poet reacts to an oddity and warns that faise makeup ,"frightening makeup" can turn off or repulse a customer. The message is very clear. It is a pome of feeling. This poem sarcastically, mischievously and amusingly succeds in producing a video still, It captures and crystalizes a moment. The conrasting imagery is effective , the waitress is precious and at the same time her make-up is absurd. We should not overlook the precise stylistics of this poem. The rhyming scheme is perfect: the metrical three-feet (trimeterf) is regular and suited to suggest a brief moment., and a swift , concise remark.. The banality of the theme is intended to draw a chuckle forom the reader or listener. Excellent craftsmanship in smplicity. Rating for efffective treaatment of a banal or trite incident is 10.
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