You

7 Comments

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  • Lost Love

    You
    Waiting to hear you shut your car door
    Big green truck, or little red sports car
    Whatever you want

    Riding in your car, seeing how fast we can go
    Holding hands while watching the falling snow
    Where ever you want to go

    Trying to satisfy you
    What is your mood?
    What do I need to do?

    I don't think when I'm with you
    I don't breath when I'm without you

    Poem Comments

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    bloomingsun commented on You

    11-17-2009

    The last lines of the first three verses and the last two really sum it up. First loves can be intense. Nice write. Keep it coming!
    Reply to Comment

    BrittKun commented on You

    11-17-2009

    Hummmm Good poem But your man need to need to want to satisfy you too. The feeling has to be mutual. But great poem keep it up.!!!!!!!
    Reply to Comment

    sawdust commented on You

    08-01-2009

    very good write its hard to write about love and devotion without repeating others write from your heart keep at it
    Reply to Comment

    1990lh commented on You

    07-31-2009

    ahh ...very sweet calm and yet dramatic full of strong love that anyone dare not question
    Reply to Comment

    soulwriter commented on You

    07-26-2009

    The simplicity of the length and woven words meld into the complexity of your feelings. Your talent surpasses your experience of age. Well done - write on and keep creating strong.
    Reply to Comment

    Paige

    07/27/2009

    lol, i think your comment should be a poem.

    Poetry is either something that lives like fire inside you or else it is nothing, an empty formalized bore around which pedants can endlessly drone their notes and explanations.

    Unknown Source

    Paige’s Poems (12)

    Title Comments Submitted
    Title Comments Submitted
    Boys and Creeps 1 07/21/2010
    What's yours 1 05/08/2010
    Happiness 5 12/08/2009
    Seasons 3 12/04/2009
    Awake 9 11/13/2009
    Smudged 7 11/13/2009
    Alone 8 08/12/2009
    Poet 9 07/27/2009
    Broken 8 10/19/2009
    These Words 7 06/17/2009
    You 7 11/13/2009
    Left Traces 6 02/27/2009
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