Poem Commentary

any comments are welcome and appreciated.  what do you think?


drawn... to the water
where stones are known
to speak
with silent affirmations
for answers we would seek

a cloak of diamonds flashing
above the sweeping deep
delays us
in adventuring too far
beyond the Keep

the kingdom's hollow echo
simply shivers in reply
we cannot see
the mural vast
just pieces to apply

singled out for searching
through the shifting shade
for a splash
to illuminate our notion
dusting sorrows off like ash

our desire to settle
on freedom, truth and love
invents a purpose
for our day
directed from above

content to watch progressions
of waves as they break
on the shore
spraying mercies on us
in forgiveness once more

August 2009

Poem Comments


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JadedJezzabel commented on breaking


the kingdom's hollow echo simply shivers in reply we cannot see the mural vast just pieces to apply now this is poetry.



Thanks, your comment is much appreciated. Come back anytime!

SavVySam commented on breaking


I missed this most excellent work...the past few months have given me a new awareness and appreciation for refinement in the crafting of a poem...You really have amazing talent...I hope that this piece is read and re-read, for it offers much!;)



Thank you, Sam, it's great to hear from you. I am grateful for the read and the comment, especially as this is one of my personal favorites... TY ~peace

knight4696 commented on breaking


Another very nice poem/ You certainly have a way of transporting the reader to a peaceful state of being. Your words are very calming and spiritual. I have a poem called ... The Awakening that I think you might enjoy. Check it out, if you will! Great Job! Ken



Thank you, much appreciated! I will check out your suggestion next.

Marsink commented on breaking


Excellent in meter and a cadence that carries one along this path of discovery of your insights. Thank you for this work to bless



I am so glad you enjoyed it. I was concerned that this one would only make sense to me. It's nice to know I'm not alone!

torimode commented on breaking


I really enjoyed this poem. The first few lines are very captivating. "Our desire to settle on freedom, truth and love." You hit the nail on the head. Those are the absolutes that we should be embracing. Torimode.



Thanks so much for commenting. Sorry it took me awhile to reply. I am still getting the hang of this site. Glad you liked it!

If I feel physically as if the top of my head were taken off, I know that is poetry.

Emily Dickinson (1830-1886) American poet.

bloomingsun’s Poems (29)

Title Comments
Title Comments
Spilling Light 2
Delivery 2
Gathering Light 9
Spring Haiku 2
Touchstone 5
Promises 1
Let Us See 4
Summary 3
Gift 7
Plea for Peace; a villanelle 7
Her Escape 16
Confession 7
Out of Our Hands 7
Child of Longing 6
Wait 5
Advent 13
haiku 7
Beach 8
Vows 4
Let Down Again 4
Just Thinking 3
Muse 3
Blossoms 3
The Power of a Flower 5
Heaven's Beach 8
Her Heart 2
Renewal 5
breaking 6
Morning on the Dock 9