Plea for Peace; a villanelle

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  • Sad

    Poem Commentary

    this is an older one of mine... written while in college...

    Plea for Peace; a villanelle

    The shrouds of mourning flap against the sky
    The chill of evil seeps and creeps around
    Silence the guns; no more shall victims die

    The hoary men and ancient women sigh
    While life's blood pours into the thirsty ground
    The shrouds of mourning flap against the sky

    Our instability will snap the tie
    A victor in this game will then be crowned
    Silence the guns; no more shall victims die

    Our voices reach up trembling to the sky
    We know then as we hear the fatal sound
    The shrouds of mourning flap against the sky

    Those few who curse and yet dare ask us "why?"
    Increase tenfold those buried in the mound
    Silence the guns; no more shall victims die

    This fatalistic world's time draws ere nigh
    We must turn back before the end is found
    The shrouds of mourning flap against the sky
    Silence the guns; no more shall victims die

    MLS

    Poem Comments

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    Marsink commented on Plea for Peace; a villanelle

    03-22-2010

    the visions of your words are so very clear and haunting. Irony is in the moody breeze that fate blows. Your meter ambles melancholy with the words well chosen. Captivating!

    bloomingsun

    03/23/2010

    So glad you enjoyed it, thanks for your comments!

    LadyL714 commented on Plea for Peace; a villanelle

    03-03-2010

    Although this poem was written while the poet was in college (not sure how long ago that was), it is still and will always be applicable to what is going on in our world. Very good writing, indeed!

    bloomingsun

    03/03/2010

    Okay, without dating myself too much, college was AWHILE ago. So grateful for your thoughtful comment, thank you!

    cousinsoren commented on Plea for Peace; a villanelle

    03-03-2010

    CORECTION OF TYPO' "for sustaining of theme" I have to visit my opticain to get new glasses soon........LOL

    cousinsoren commented on Plea for Peace; a villanelle

    03-03-2010

    Bloomingsun skilfully stuck to the characteristics of a French verse form known as a "Villanelle" She has achieved an exquisite poem in that art form, perfectly composed. "The shrouds of mourning flap against the sky" This poem is rich in uniquely constructed and rich metaphors laden with implications which cannot be dealt with here. I must return to read and reread into this poem, with the intention to write a review or an appreciation of it. For correctnes of style, genre, sustining of theme, and implications, my rating is 10 x10 +

    bloomingsun

    03/03/2010

    Well I am quite nearly speechless... Thank you for your smart and thoughtful comments! Thanks for such high praise... I am blushing... ~peace! :)

    SavVySam commented on Plea for Peace; a villanelle

    02-24-2010

    A sane and rational plea presented with a dramatic flair. The effect of the repeating line is chilling... Great work, important message!

    bloomingsun

    02/24/2010

    Sam, thanks so much for your thoughtful words and for taking time to read and comment...

    The true philosopher and the true poet are one, and a beauty, which is truth, and a truth, which is beauty, is the aim of both.

    Ralph Waldo Emerson, American Poet (1803-1882)

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