Here I am so broken hearted,

I don’t know what got this all started.

from a very young age dairy and I have parted,

had two pieces of pizza, to the bathroom I darted.

Milk and cookies I’d like, pretty please,

Thoughts of Gouda and feta weaken my knees,

alas for me there can will be no cheese

Oh for a simple dish of ice cream,

visons of a mint-summers night creamy dream.

Soybean and natural products won’t do,

I just want a cheeseburger with the rest of the crew,

hot chocolate with milk, sweet as morning dew,

the effect of 2 percent turns me a greenish hue.

Even organic dairy won’t work,

In that damn carton disaster doth lurk,

causing a gaseous cloud like a murk,

this crap never happened to Captain Kirk.

I look for a new connection, but find no ease.

any indulgence causes an ungentle breeze,

the breath of a most gastronomical disease.

my burger is undressed, for I can have no more cheese,