23 Seconds


  • Passion

    Poem Commentary

    umm....this is pretty straigtforward i think

    23 Seconds

    his pleasure grows as she undresses,
    silky ribbons of pale slender limbs,
    exactly as he imagined,
    she controls him from within,
    eyes of almond gold,
    flecks of fierce desire,
    his engorged member ascends into her fire,
    slick with rain and oil,
    rainbows cascading as her moans begin to boil,
    from deep within his being,
    he fills her with his lust,
    23 seconds of euphoric bonded trust,
    smoky remnants of flesh remain
    as the bed linens burn,
    hatred and love,
    the strongest passions reign,
    screams of joy and pain
    his pleasure dims as she melts over him,
    like wax dripping from a lit candle,
    tender streaks of silt and sweat,
    whiskey lips of peppermint,
    inhaled, exhaled, weary eyes explode,
    her body built to implode,
    globes of perfect weight caressed in workman's hands
    sated creatures of this life and land...

    Poem Comments


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    purdylox commented on 23 Seconds


    ok this is very sweet poem and not sweet like ahh so nice but like that so sweet and great lolol

    tenderpoison commented on 23 Seconds


    I love your writing and this is a great piece...but really, 23 seconds? it took longer to read it! 23 seconds...wow! I believe that's called wham, bam, thank you mam...



    lol...23 seconds was a generalized timing of, umm...orgasm, not the lovemaking itself...but sometimes wam bam is enough too

    Artie commented on 23 Seconds


    Another great write my friend, 10 from me.........



    thank you artie, if you have the time, read my other new one, called The Never Said

    ladypoet commented on 23 Seconds


    "23 seconds of euphoric bonded trust," That line is deep to me for some reason, I actually pictured a painting in my head lol, 23 seconds of bonded trust...very profound. But I also like this piece very sexual in a creative way! God bless -Lady P.

    bforibus commented on 23 Seconds


    hot all the way through. the analogies. the metaphors. the visuals. the flow. all of tht played a part in this poem being great



    thanks for the comment bfor, if you get a chance, check out my new one called Tree

    Poetry is finer and more philosophical than history; for poetry expresses the universal, and history only the particular.

    Aristotle (384 BC-322 BC) Greek philosopher.

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