Regret of the Rarely Seen


Poem Commentary

in some way, this is about alzheimers, my possible fate, as i lost a grandfather recently to this dreadful evil life sucking disease

Regret of the Rarely Seen

she is frantically trying
to stop crying
in front of others
her worst fear to die like a deer
in headlights
roasted by the arrested rights
of people who glimmer
but never shimmer
as brightly as she in her mirror image
shes beyond pretending
shes a wreckage of titanic metal
an ocean of frost
a ship of lost innocence
she smells of immorality and drugs
though she never touches the stuff
inside her faulty towers
a match of wits between evil lovers
who will fail and who cannot succeed
one will walk away
one will bleed
to limp away in disgrace is to die
in a lesser embrace
she doesnt let them meet
her fantasy and her reality
cleft in twain like boston rain
washing the streets of residue
she can sleep in a hole and believe
in a less decadent zoo
only animals freely decide
who to love and what to hide
she knows the impossibility of dying with grace
the sunlight tattoos age on her face
the shawl is wrapped about her
the tag is tied to her toes as they wither
wracked with cough and manic shivers
she lives in dreams
leaving this world in a nightmare
and the loving stares of everyone who is with her
we collect our tears and replace them with cards
and flowers we bought in a hygienic place
she doesnt care because she was already gone
when we descended to her floor
years ago would have been better but we have better
things to do
youth like butterflies flap out wings and we die
but we live dont we, another five years,
another seven,
while angels cradle our hopes in heaven
and sit on harps built from stones
and bones, images of erections
derelict messages to those on earth left so utterly
with faith we buy our freedom from life and we fear nothing
but death
and its cold embrace, its nightly entrance into our dreams
our coffins
beneath our subconscious subterranean selves
she breathes and collaborates and issues declarations
from her hospital bed sheathed in white
the lamp above like a halo around deaths grinning light
forever and ever we praise the AMEN
and tomorrow we will lower her to earth again
but i will never forget the empty vessel
of her eyes
or the last time she saw her last sunrise
for in her pain i saw my own demise
let it rain, let it fill me and drown me, i have no time for regret, i have only enough time to paint her portrait,
on the wall of my soul, i will not let her go,
and i will accept my place in this maze
of senseless beauty and loss of control

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latinangel commented on Regret of the Rarely Seen


This is a very touching poem. It touches a special place for me because my father-in-law had Alzheimer's. He died over a year ago. This disease is such a terrible thing to watch, it is so hard not to take it personally. In the end, I don't think he knew who I was but he accepted me as part of the family and he trusted me to take care of him, grabbing onto my hand when we were walking. He loved me and I will always love him. You are such a talented writer and I know you will disagree with me but, it is so true. You are an artist in the true sense of the word. Your poems are always like a roller coaster ride to me. I love to read you.

Stardrift commented on Regret of the Rarely Seen


Quite possibly one of the saddest poems I've ever read, Amad! The multiple allusions to 'below', are indeed unsettling and renders one all too mindful of mortality. Most people don't know quite how painful the physiological disease of Alzheimer's really is. I'm very sorry to hear about your grandfather - bless his soul! The theme here was a bit more forthright - more time spent feeling than interpreting on this one. You tripped me up a spot at the end - and i will accept my place in this maze - I sure as heck don't! This is another soul and heart pummeling write, my poet brother! I think you need a helping of humor - check out my leftfield latest - Neanderlove. Your latest here is unforgettable, and for me, generated a sense of existential, and however-unfortunately-directionless rebellion. ~~ ~ 1~ 0~~



awesome comment, especially coming from you, i consider you a far better poet than myself. this poem took form as most of mine do, me not having a clue where im going but hoping i get there without taking the wrong exit. i dont craft these poems so much as splatter them on the wall like pollack and hope whatever happens ends up being something someone might understand. thank you for the comments star, keep reading

scrye commented on Regret of the Rarely Seen


Well to start this lady must say that your poetic talent one, never disappoints and two, this was skillfully crafted and love absolutly love reading your poetry. You create wonderful masterpieces with artistry of words. Thank you for sharing this and a piece of yourself. Bravo loved every word.

photochick commented on Regret of the Rarely Seen


like always amad your poetry is that of breath taking art grand imagery of the past sad and yet beautiful words at the same time a grand canvas of poetic words you have here brought tears tot he eyes great write amad your talent once again shines here 10 with out a second thought higher if i could keep writing for your talent shines in everything you write

Cathryn1983 commented on Regret of the Rarely Seen


You said you read this to your dad...what did he think about it? I found myself tearing up.

Poetry is either something that lives like fire inside you or else it is nothing, an empty formalized bore around which pedants can endlessly drone their notes and explanations.

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AmadeusEx’s Poems (89)

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