“Vampire Jokingly”

peering over the edge of the hedge

a living nightmare awoke me

from a sleeping nightmare

one morphed into the other until

I was barely aware of what awesome

gruesome haunt had honored me with

his bloodshot stare,

I had never seen a vampire before now

my friends I don’t know how I knew then

what I still know now

a real vampire with a really wicked stare

had me in his sights, I fervently hoped I

was not in the running for his next bite

of undead food,

I was speechless, so I began to sing,

“ please Mr. Vampire don’t bite me tonight,

tomorrow might be alright,

depending on the distance

I cover in flight

from the old slice and bite machine

which has been so well

advertised on the silver screen

not getting bitten has got me

all het up and chewing

over the benefits

I might be getting

If I just had the nerve

To look over the edge

Of that hedge

And sing the song

Bouncing through my mind

“Please Mr. Vampire

don’t bite too hard now

somehow it jest wouldn’t seem right

for you to take my life tonight”

now I have friends

who sleep in a lot

who think a lot

like me

Mr. Vampire,

my main man at the hedge,

the man with the edge,

. 

Goodnight my friend,

I be seeing you soon

when daylight fades.

© Sam Hyde

   01-25-11